Archive for October, 2009


blood with a vengeance, yo, just in time for halloween. whee!

so if you’re looking for word substance, you’ll have to wait a day. because right now i’m ridiculously hungry, devoid of whiskey, and did i mention the ghoulish cramps?

but tomorrow? tomorrow is nablopomo (too lazy to link.) and it’s on. i may suck. i may fail. but it is on.

pee ess, no costume for jude this year, but here she is in her honorary flowergirl getup, making a “funny face” on command:

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spotting today. dipping temp. raging pms with requisite anxiety, inflamed body image issues, and whininess. this isn’t the month, y’all. i’m anticipating tomorrow being cd1.

bring on the clomid check, ie getting felt up all up in my ovaries.
bring on the liquor.

but here is some levity. best photo ever of my beloved friends, big jude and her remarkably light husband steve, the reason we drove 17 hours through the rain to nashville:

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all apologies to those of you who were hoping for some sort of news on monday. we were traveling home monday and yesterday, and i was altogether away from teh interwebs. but now i’m back. with no news. as recently as this morning, i am testing negative. my temps are still way high, though. no spotting. a blanket sort of nausea that comes in waves. though i’m hopeful that i will test positive soon, i’m preparing myself for the likely reality that clomid can cause a longer luteal phase than i’m used to, and less pre-menstrual spotting. so. there’s that.

in other news: how did jude do on a seventeen hour roadtrip? did she love or hate wearing a frilly bridesmaid dress? stay tuned. stories galore to come.

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temps are nice and high in a consistent sort of way now that i’m breathing through my nose again. beginning yesterday, a blanket of nausea has taken me over in the morning. it’s a familiar nausea, one i learned to live with for 17 weeks when i was pregnant with jude. my hips ached so much last night that i couldn’t sleep. h rubbed them like she did when i was in labor, like she did for my whole pregnancy. these are not psychosomatic symptoms.

i will test on my birthday, which is monday.

i am calm about this, not obsessing at all…probably because we’re driving to nashville overnight tonight. nothing like a colossal distraction to make the tww fly. i’ve already packed my peestick(s) and cup. here’s hoping for a july bug.

pee ess dear jude, i have a letter to you brewing in my head. photos are at the ready. you have been warned.

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charting one’s temp is shite when one has become a congested mouthbreather.

peep this beast:

Picture 1


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so, i am home sick for a second day, as i try to rid myself of the green goo residing in my head. jude had her mmr shots yesterday, and is seconds away from cutting her bottom molars. this combination has resulted in a cranky, contrary, tantrum-y toddler, who has taken to biting my nips in frustration. last night, she even bit one through my shirt. oh, my little angel.

while it makes my heart ache to think she is not feeling well, it is also hilarious to hear her swear to herself in that unintelligible pre-english language of hers. she is yosemite sam in a diaper.

chart update: temp is still up. insemmed last night. i got another +opk this morning. yesterday’s was an immediate 2 dark lines. today’s took about a minute, but it is definitely positive. so, we will do it again tonight, for good measure. i’m pretty sure my egg was waiting for the swimmers last night, twiddling her thumbs, and staring at her egg timer.

in the unromantic moment of the insem, i tried to imagine all this clinical stuff resulting in an actual person. a daughter or son. jude’s sister or brother. and h sang the yo gabba gabba song “think happy thoughts” quietly to herself as she did the deed. afterward, we watched an episode of modern family on hulu.

i’m going to take a nap now, but here is my new favorite pic of j, taken by rachel.


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[note: for those readers who have no desire to know about charting cycles, you may want to skip this post entirely. it will be very boring for you.]

so.  yesterday.  cd12.  i had a significant temp shift.  i did temp at 5 am, instead of the usual 7:30ish. opk was negative. i chalked it up to being sick, and crappy sleep. today is (natch) cd13, and temp is up for a 2nd day. opk was ridiculously positive. test line was twice as dark as the control. obviously, we are going to insem tonight.

my question lies with yesterday’s temp. i have never had a temp shift before a +opk. i usually ovulate the day after my first +. oh charting masters, when do you think O day will be? today? tomorrow? how would you plan insems if you were in my ovaries shoes?

here is a visual:

Picture 1

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ohchicken is:

  • sick. again. she had way less sinus infections when she smoked a pack a day.
  • cd12.  negative opk. twingy in the right twingy places.  soon.
  • the proud parent to a child who can sing (only intelligibly to her mothers) “twinkle twinkle little star”, but only the first bar.  and it sounds more like “kle kle kle kle *mumble* tar”.
  • so happy to have met the rajen fambly this weekend.  photos are forthcoming.
  • not sure when she’ll find the time to upload many photos from her camera.
  • ready to breathe through her nose again.
  • so over the flavor of menthol.
  • flu negative, according to the swab and blood tests she had yesterday.

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day 3 of clomid, and my body is angry with me. not only am i experiencing a hefty dose of ppms (that’s pre-pms, for those of you playing at home), today i am as nauseous as the memory of myself 8 weeks pregnant.

someone please pass the saltines.

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of note

today begins clomid challenge 2009! whee!

i have a new ob/gyn who was recommended by my midwife as being “midwife-friendly”. i don’t know that she is especially friendly towards them, as much as less hostile. she reiterated the party line about taking my unborn child’s life into my own hands by choosing to work with a midwife, etc. i nodded and said i understood.

the thing about this new doctor is that she seems to be a rather crunchy, braid-to-her-butt type. she held eye contact with me for a long time. her eyes are deeply green. after quizzing my knowledge of my own reproduction system and its issues, she agreed with me that if i want to have a child sooner than later, clomid is a good idea. after an ultrasound, which i had. aside from some follicular cysts, all looks well in there. i’m having a big ass blood panel done whenever i finish procrastinating, which will include a test for toxoplasmosis. anyone listen to radiolab? after the episode about the genius of parasites, i have a whole new respect and mortal fear of toxo.

back to the un-nicknamed doctor, at the end of our visit, she advised that, should i have an emergency transport when it comes time for me to give birth again, she would not be willing to be the doctor on call. fair enough. however, and at this point she gave me the green-eyed stare again, she did say that if my pregnancy ended up high risk for whatever reason, she would be happy to be my doctor. well okay then.

all this to say, i’m ambivalent about my new ob/gyn, but my gut says to trust her. so she will remain my ob/gyn for the foreseeable future.

let the challenge begin!

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