ah yesterday. yesterday was a nice day. big jude and steve were in town on account of steve’s band’s big ol’ concert last night. despite feeling, ahem, ILL myself, i couldn’t possibly miss time with such beloved friends. and so i packed up ziggy and drove big mama (our momvan) up to a rather large church.
what ensued was a day of quick catchup with jude as she set up all the merch. there were stolen moments with steve, when he was not dashing off to a meeting or soundcheck or some other rockstar responsibility. throughout the day, lots of conversations abounded: about love and babies and estrangements and forgiveness and babies and sufjan stevens.
ziggy spent most of the day sacked out in my arms. it was a lovely experience to spend so much time with him away from home, on my own. it’ll be a rare occurrence, i know. and so i really savored being solo mom, wholly focused on my son at every moment, outside of the context of our family unit. meanwhile, back at the fort, h and j were having the same kind of day, only inverted. the only alone time they ever have anymore is when they go out together, running errands, or burning off toddler energy at the park. yesterday was the first day they really got to spend a day alone together at home since i came home from work in august.
at the end of the day, we reconvened as a foursome and were all refreshed a bit. ILL still, but refreshed. after her bath, i blow-dried jude’s hair for the first time ever, which she loved. we read books and sang songs at bedtime. h caught up on ziggy snuggles and diaper changes. i told h, i may feel pretty miserable at the moment, but i’m actually really happy. and then ziggy slept for EIGHT hours for the first time ever.
but anyway, back at the big ass church, there were only a few awkward moments with churchy folk, the awkwardest of which was when a well-meaning woman asked if zig takes after my husband, to which i replied no. that’s a half lie, because zig does happen to look almost identical to uncle g, but uncle g is not my husband, so alas, my son does not look like my husband. shrug, i just didn’t feel like opening the can of worms. not that i was afraid. it was more the proverbial ‘pearls before swine’ thing. the well-meaning woman wasn’t swine; she was simply making small talk. she didn’t want to have a conversation with me at all. she wanted to coo at my baby and walk away. so i let her do just that.
steve and i talked a bit about that later. as you may have surmised, his band plays a lot of churches, and that leads many people [read: fans] to assume certain things about the way each of his bandmates believes and votes. and so he is left with the constant question of: which conversations are worth pursuing? we agreed that sometimes, it just makes sense to let them think you have a husband. and then we giggled and i nursed my baby.