Archive for October 1st, 2010

even more bullets.

the following are things i have no time on which to elaborate, though i very much want to:

  • my son smells like honey.
  • he also has actual hair.
  • i love to smell his hairy, honey head.
  • recovery from a birth without tearing is (surprise!) much easier than a birth a torn perineum.  i actually look mostly “normal” in the netherlands, and can properly sit on my ass without pain.  i never knew this was possible.
  • on account of the faster recovery, i can actually hold my boy, change diapers, and nurse sitting up.  i couldn’t do any of these things with jude till she was at least 3 weeks old.
  • still not used to wiping balls.
  • have only been properly peed on once, though.
  • whiskey tastes better than i remember.
  • sometimes i feel absolutely delirious from lack of sleep.
  • my milk came in on day two of ziggy’s life on the outside.  not a moment too soon, either.  he’d spent the rest of the night previous screaming for 8 hours straight because colostrum was for suckers.  also, he loves my milk.
  • he loves my milk so much that last night i ate for dinner two helpings of:  porkchops, steamed spinach, and cornbread.  and i still had room for ice cream.
  • did i mention that i’m exhausted?
  • even though he sleeps for 3-4 hour stretches at night?
  • now i forgot what i was even going to say.
  • here, have some pictures from the iphone.  [i’ve been too tired to upload and edit from my big girl camera.]

[oh that big sister jude. how i long to be able to properly interact with her again. it breaks my heart multiple times a day to NOT be the one to comfort her, feed her, even discipline her. i hate being the inert mommy. i cry a lot about this. oh yeah, that was my last bullet point: holy hell these post partum hormones are kicking my arse. i weep many times a day, feel lost in a sea of emotion, and have to remind myself over and over that this will most definitely pass. at some point. here, have a little whiskey, darling self.]

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