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Archive for September 7th, 2007

first, thank you to everyone who left such encouraging comments on my last post. they have bolstered me as i’ve bled with vengeful cramps. i haven’t had a period this intense in a long, long time.

[oh! reminder! must call in clomid prescription…]

anyway, i knew i wasn’t pregnant on h’s birthday, and decided to treat that knowledge as a blessing to be a little more reckless. we had coffee and beer and cigarettes oh my! it was a good day. we played pool at our favorite bar, and even had an irish car bomb at 4pm. good times.

a few minutes into our first pool game, h knew what she wanted to get for her birthday: a new tattoo. she has been talking about this for a long time, wanting a tattoo that binds her to me.

i wear a constellation of stars and a bird on my back. stars have always been the great symbol of my life. they are constancy, like God, like prayer, like heartbeats. in the seasons of my life when i cannot pray, i draw stars on my hands. over and over like a mantra. the star on my left shoulder blade is hope. the one on my right is joy. (h held my hand as i got that one.)

and so, h decided to have a star tattooed over her heart for me. and i decided to have a lodestar–a north star–tattooed on my neck for her. in downtown austin, there are tattoo parlors on every corner. so, we left the bar, walked across the street, and after five minutes of inking, we were done.

here we are:

i am the star on her heart.
lodestar.

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