hello there, all. i must thank you a bazillion times over for the wonderfully kind words you sent my way after my last post. the commiseration and encouragement have carried me a long way.
after a full on panic attack on new years eve, i filled my prescriptions. i’m taking a very low dose of prozac (10 mg every other day), and have only needed the klonopin once. hormonally, i’ve felt a little more balanced. and my overwhelming love for my child is feeling more…palpable these days. already, i feel able to savor emotion a little longer, before it takes off in another direction entirely.
i apologize for the dearth of posts around here over the holidays. we have traveled every weekend (to dallas and tiny, texas respectively), and my work days have been longish and draining. i just accepted a lateral sort of promotion, which will hopefully mean more professional visibility, and i’m spending my days now learning the ropes. and pumping, of course. in fact, i should probably go do that now.
but here, have a blurry happy photo of my judelet, who now waves at me as i leave for work.
pee ess, i just remembered it’s that delurking time of year. care to reveal yourselves, hordes of lurkers? (all 1 of you.)
i’d love to wave hello to you specifically!
Look at that drooly determination on her precious face.
I’m glad things seem to be evening out, if only a little more.
=)
I love those sweet little ruffles on those sweet more-than-little wrists!
Delurking here. Live in TX also near Corpus Christi on the coast. We are thinking maybe of moving to Austin eventually, our community here is non existant which is frustrating at times.
de-lurking here, in san francisco. my partner and i will be starting the baby-making process this spring, also with a known donor. thanks for writing this great blog. we’ve learned so much!
delurker alert!
Hi! My partner and I have been ttc for about 6 months and we live just outside of SF.
When we started trying I started looking for mama x 2 blogs and found yours.
Delurking here from the Pacific North West (Portland, OR to be specific.)
I’ve been reading and loving your blog since spring. I found you when I was browsing blogs. My little Maeve was born 5/30, so we were very close in pregnancy age.
I just love your blog. You’re so open and honest about the good, AND the bad. Everyone talks about how great having a baby is, but they don’t talk about how challenging that pesky life balance part is. (Especially when nursing is involved.)
Keep your chin up mamma!
Cheers!
You know I’m always here! The non-celibate wife is here too, of course.
i so heart that blurry little sparkling jude!!! she makes me smile… big hugs to you, friend, i am kind of de-lurking ~ i havent been the best at commenting but i am always reading and checking in on you and your lovely fambly.
Hello there! New here. Poppycat referred me after my post about depression and anxiety during ttc. It has been interesting to read through your stacks. Congrats on such a BEAUTIFUL baby! She is absolutely amazing and you two seem like great parents! If you ever feel like making room for me on your blogroll, that would be great. I will follow your journey as a mama and I want to say how impressed I am with your candor and willingness to discuss the difficult stuff. It’s not all tits and champagne, is it?
Thanks again,
Jill
Delurking in the SF Bay Area…just found your blog last week and I’m enjoying it. Thanks for your honesty about the challenges with your brain chemistry, I find that refreshing. My wife and I are just starting on the journey toward having children, learning about donor options, etc. Can’t wait until we can have our own 2 Mom blog and post pics of our own darlings!
I’m so glad to hear you are feeling a bit better… I was a tad worried for you!
Delurking here too! I’ve been following your blog for several months. Found it through lesbianfamily.org. Your blog is one of my favorites. Your writing style is so wonderful, you just have a beautiful way of expressing yourself. Several posts have moved me to tears. You have an absolutely beautiful family too.
Can’t remember if I have said hello or not, so…hi! Been following your blog for a bit. I can’t remember how I found it, maybe through a friend of a friend…who knows. We are a queer family (though you would never know it looking at us – it’s complicated) and enjoy hearing from others out there!
delurking to say hi and happy new year! glad to hear you are feeling better.
i lurk from the UK- also on the trail to a baby- its taking a long time… with a known donor. been lurking since you were pregnant. your daughter is gorgeous.
Hello all….My name is Carolyn and I am a lurker. I live in Baltimore with my partner Alison and like many here, I was looking for a blog about lesbian couples ttc and raising families (or fambllies as the case may be). Thanks for sharing your world with us.
Hey! I never lurk. In fact, I usually comment too often! Ha! So glad to hear about your return to medicine. I know it’s different for everyone. It really helped me be a better mom, though. Peace and love!
I have left a comment another time I do believe, but just wanted to say hi. Our 2nd parent adoptions were final the same day
Jude is adorable and I am glad you are feeling better! I found you from Rajen!
Hiya… I am de-lurking. I am not sure if I have ever commented here, but I have been reading since around when Jude was born…
Isn;t it sweet when they can wave goodbye? It felt like a real milestone to me…
Hugs from Canada…
I am so glad you’re doing better. You simply sound better. Miss Jude is just gorgeous. I can’t believe she’s waving! They grow so quickly!
De-lurking from Maine
I have family in TX and family with a baby blog, so I think I found you several months (you were pretty brand new, I think… pre-Jude – I remember initially being really interested in your photography) ago linked to another blog (probably soulbliss – can’t remember)… You guys have SUCH a frickin’ CUTE little girl! She has such an impish little look to her 
I’m an unabashed follower, openly, unlurked. Thought I’d pop in an comment anyway. Looks like I may be in Austin in early april, so mark the calendario!
We just recently unlurked ourselves and love love love the pictures of little Jude. We’re surprised at how many lurkers you have from the San Francisco Bay area. We thought we were the only ones. Silly nuts. Very glad to hear that things are evening out for you emotionally. Your candor makes it easier for others to accept and deal with in our lives
you are doing better on medicine than me and my back. i have been going to a pain management doctor who links chronic pain to depression. he has me on 100mg of imipramine and 0.5 mg of klonopin. he wants me to take 1 mg of the klonopin, but if i take any more of it, i feel all groggy and “slow” the next day. lately, however, i have started to notice a decrease in my back pain and an increase in my activity level! perhaps the medicine has helped afterall!
i miss you, helen, and jude! take care and keep in touch!
xoxoxo
Jude is just beautiful.
And I’m de-lurking a bit late.
I am delurking my self, yes, I know I am a little late. I find so much inspiration in your site. My partner and I have not yet begun to try to concieve together. I have two kids from a previous relationship that she has accepted and loves as her own. But, I feel like you are an extension of our community.
Delurking here. I live South of Boston with my partner and 1 1/2 year old daughter. I love to read as many 2 mom blogs as possible. Your daughter is beautiful!
Heya! I think I have previously de-lurked, but thought I should again, as I don’t comment regularly. My partner and I live in Sydney, Australia, and have been ttc for about 7 months with a known donor. No luck so far, but I have loved reading your blog and your beautiful turn of phrase and gentle humour. I think I found you via “pbx makes four”.
Jude is just gorgeous. And if it helps, my mum has had to take anti-depressants for over half my life, and accepting the chemical imbalance and dealing with it made all the difference to her (and our) quality of life.
i love yr blog and your chubby baby–i think i’m just relieved to see that someone else has a little chubbins and that my baby does not have gigantism!
de-lurking – straight suburban mom (and MD) from St louis – lurking here almost a year, can’t even remember how i found you but love your writing, your pics, your patience with yourself and others, your family and your inspiration…