sometimes.

i lose the balance
fall backwards
in fear
i can’t do this i can’t do this
i’m so tired
stretched so thin
i understand every cliche of motherhood
this is not a poem
i’m too exhausted for that sort of thing
so i pass off the baby
take a klonopin and a sip of whiskey
and hope for sleep
so tomorrow will be new

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all new baby.

i told my friend shannon yesterday that it feels like we have just abruptly encountered the beginning of the end of jude’s babydom. she replied, “everything is the beginning of the end when they’re in this stage. and by ‘this stage’ i mean all of childhood”.
right.
childhood.
so. this weekend was an explosion [...]

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7 months

dear jude,
once again, my letter to you is belated. what can i say? we are all a bunch of sickies at our house. beginning a week ago–not coincidentally, three days after visiting your pediatrician–all of our throats became a telltale kind of scratchy, and it’s all gone downhill from there. all [...]

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the sick.

all three of us are sick, simultaneously. i am back at work today, after two days at home with my girls, and i feel wave two of the sick taking me over. and these cough drops are shite.
the redeeming part of the whole experience? getting to be home to watch [...]

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have i mentioned?

have i mentioned that i really miss having time to thoughtfully post here? tomorrow is jude’s 7 month birthday, and i am hoping for a block of time to sit down and write her a letter. h, however, is under the weather. j seems to be close behind, with loads of congested [...]

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new trick!

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all things new.

hello there, all. i must thank you a bazillion times over for the wonderfully kind words you sent my way after my last post. the commiseration and encouragement have carried me a long way.
after a full on panic attack on new years eve, i filled my prescriptions. i’m taking a [...]

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